Love,one of  the basic needs of humans. Love which is both beautiful and ugly, is a tough concept.  Just as death leaves none. Love too ,leaves none. (by love, I refer to love between man and woman) Today or tomorrow everyone falls in love. Its natural and inevitable ,though the success of the love is in the hands of fate.

In most of the novels and movies, its man who falls in love and proposes the gal,makes promises, talks sweet words and buys expensive gifts for the gal. Its the man who makes the first move and slowly ,gal too ,falls for him.  Even if she didn't love him initially.  There will be ''happily ever after.''

Its so easy to win a gals heart. But what if gal falls in love first. Is it okay if gal proposes a guy ? Especially in this patriarchal society. A society where men are the decision makers,where men are believed to be wise and matured than women. Indian  Society makes man feel himself to be greater than woman and  fills man with lot of  ego. ''The male ego''

So, when a beautiful smart gal proposes a boy. the boy will be delighted to have got a gal without any effort  and is sure to say '' yes ''  ,even if he is not sure of his feelings.  Accordingly, he will date her but the chances of relationship being a fairy tale  is quiet hard.

There are several  reasons. First of all, a gal with the courage to propose a boy will be strong and commanding . Hence, herself, a decision maker. Therefore, the chances of ego clashes are more and Indian boys have grown up seeing their mother obediently following fathers instructions .Hence they may expect his girl to obey him as his mother obeyed his father,  which our bold and brave gal will never do. Hence, leading to difference in opinion ,quarrels and hurting of male ego.
Secondly,  in a corner of his heart ,the boy may start feeling that ' I didnt choose the gal but the gal choose me' again the invisible male ego is uncomfortable

There is also a possibility that when a gal proposes a boy, his ego gets a boost. He may start thinking himself to be more handsome and capable than he is actually.  May start feeling that he deserves a prettier gal than the one who proposed him leading to unsatisfied in the relationship. Also,we know that one doesn't value the things got easily.  Its the same here too. So in his view,   she might never be as good as the other gals.

This doesn't mean that a gal should not propose a boy. Every love story is different. It may not have worked for many people but it might work for you. You never know until you try. Its better to give a shot than to regret five years later.


--Amruta